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Message to Filmmakers #1:

With the recent release of Super 8 and the last year Inception, it seems like Hollywood is working their way back up to the originality ladder.  With the exception of sequels, prequels, adaptions, reboots, and remakes, its good to see movie makers making an effort on using their creativity.  Even though with all my happiness there’s also sadness. Sadness for the stupidity of the other filmmakers, who are making horrible, horrible films like this and this (I never watched this before, mom. Trust me.) So with this, I hope to inform them about their stupidity and teach them how to avoid their previous mistakes in the future. I plan to make these whenever I spot a problem in the industry. So be prepared to read these letters often, and if you don’t want to, then that’s okay…I guess. I’ll just let my mother read them so she could congratulate me on making an effort.

Low Budget

Dear Filmmakers,

Lets do some role playing for a minute. Lets say you’re an aspiring director/writer and you just wrote your first complete movie script. Your extensive vocabulary accentuates your intelligence making your action packed alien plot movie starring Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson and Megan Fox even more enticing to make. It’s sure to win you an academy award or a big stack of cash at the box office. So…why don’t you start on it? Oh, I see. Your only problem: is that you don’t have enough money to film this movie and no loaner is  going to give a rookie like you, their money so you could follow your dream. Too bad for you, huh? Oh, wait, what is this? You seem to not care and going to make your explosive movie anyway? Good for you, you go ahead and show them who’s boss.

But this is what your final product is going to look like:

or like this:   (At least this starred Bruce Campbell)

My Suggestion:

Save your screenplay for another time when you’re up to Steven Spielberg level and start fresh with something that’s going to cost you less money, less experience, and more trust from producers (Because you’re scaring them with all this alien talk for your first movie, it’s creepy.) Write another Juno, starring an unknown cast and a smaller budget. Take your time with it and be comfortable with it. You don’t have to create any monsters or aliens with bad cgi, just make your movie and make it well. Then when people will see it and like it (hopefully), they’re going to start following you and anticipating what your next project will be. And this is when producers are going to start coming after you, asking if they could fund your next masterpiece. Then everything will come out well and you can do your happy dancing.


P.s. Thanks for reading and comment below if you have anything else to add!


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Submarine dives in! (Unfunny pun, I know…)

The Richard Ayoade directed and written film, Submarine, is off to a good start. With a 85% on rottentomatoes and a 7.6 on imdb, it seems to be well liked by critics and audience as well (that’s a first)! Details below:

Synopsis: 15-year-old Oliver Tate has two objectives: To lose his virginity before his next birthday, and to extinguish the flame between his mother and an ex-lover who has resurfaced in her life. (Where was this movie when I was 15?)

Trailer Here



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